R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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