I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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