i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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