We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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