I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
