Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
