I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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