dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
