Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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