Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
