Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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