my mouth tastes like poor choices
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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