she woke up with a sticky ear
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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