TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
