just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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