I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
