I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
