names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize
