awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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