Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
