idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
