She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Just high enough for therapy.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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