I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
