hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
