We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
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