I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize