There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
