My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
