JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
