I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
