she woke up with a sticky ear
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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