sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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