i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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