so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize