Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
