No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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