I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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