they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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