She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
