It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
