I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
