I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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