Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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