Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
