lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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