You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
