your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
