i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
