He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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