Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
